Congrats Martyn and Siobhan

Last night my cousin gave birth to a beautiful daughter, Pippa Jane!

THE LAST GOODBYE: OFFICIAL VIDEO

People need to stop making videos because the best has been made.

David Cook - The Last Goodbye (Official Video) from analythinker on Vimeo.

REASONS I AM EXCITED THE WORLD DIDN'T END

Since the scheduled apocalypse came and went and I am still here I figured I would help express my relief. Nearly dying in a worldwide rolling earthquake does, after all put things into perspective.

1. more time to read GOOD OMENS
2. More time to not read HARRY POTTER
4. Time to think of a number three
5. Get to see more Terry Gilliam movies (or maybe not)
6. Watch SNL with Justin Timberlake
7. buy David Cook album
8. More concerts
9. Continue to say all the places I want to visit before I die.
10. Continue to bitch about how far away Australia is and how long it takes to get there.
11. Put Graham in drag.
12. Have a Pug
13. Have children
14. Question why Pug came before children
15. See the newest TRANSFORMERS and PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN to understand why any movies need a year of promo.
15. Continue to make Phillip S. Hoffman confused
16. Mock two more TWILIGHT films
17. See Prince William get crowned King
18. Live in Manhattan
19. Smoke pot
20. Go on the Disney Cruise

WILL MAY 21, 2011 BE THE END OF THE WORLD? AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHO IS TO BLAME?

For, I can't even remember how long, there have been people toting the idea that tomorrow is Judgement Day and until this week I thought they were nuts but, being the paranoid freak that I am, it did start to get to me. I mean the world has to end sometime and while Christians are taught to beware of false profits, how can one be sure when they are false? After some research I feel a lot better because basically some dude decided, based on some concocted ideas and faulty math, that tomorrow will be judgement and the end of the world will be October. I also found a ton of religious people saying that God said nobody but him would know when the end was so I am 99.9% sure it will all be okay.

That said if something major happens, blame Terry Gilliam. I know what you are thinking, "I thought she was a huge fan of the maverick director. She wrote a huge blog about it in the Fall and read a book of his interviews for an obscenely long time." While those things are true, lets look at some facts.

Just this week Gilliam mentioned how he is attempting to make THE DEFECTIVE DETECTIVE, a project that he has attempted several times and every time it has collapsed. This by itself may not be a sign of the Apocalypse but pair it with his illustrious history of failure, near failure and disaster.

MONTY PYTHON HOLY GRAIL, directorial debut, plagued by bad weather, cast disputes, money trouble.

BRAZIL, first dream project, turns into nightmare as budget get sliced, stress leads Terry into temporary paralysis, and producers decide movie needs to be dumbed down for US audiences. This leads to very long public battle, that gets movie released eventually but causes Gilliam to begin to be thought of as difficult.

BARON MUNCHHAUSEN, very next film proves even worse financial issues as German producer promises huge budget and then goes Nazi when he can't deliver. Backers get mad, blame Gilliam, try to sue him and replace him. Special effects must be cut, scenes compromised, but Director makes it work. Studios Change creative heads during production leading studio to not care about project and barley release film with almost no promotion.

After this point Gilliam movies became considered Taboo, nobody wanted anything to do with anything he came up with so he decides for the first time, to do a movie where he had not created it in hopes of winning over producers to again make original work. This was 1991'S FISHER KING, a highly successful film and was followed by an even bigger success, 1994's TWELVE MONKEYS, but it would be 2009-20 years and five films before a Gilliam Original, IMAGINARIUM OF DR PARNASSUS, was released. Of those five, TIDELAND lost it's distributors and funding (leading Gilliam to take to the streets of New York to beg for money, but really gain attention,) and THE BROTHERS GRIMM hit so many road blocks that it was released over a year later than originally planned and so many compromises were made in both direction that both the director and his producers hated the movie.


Both of these were considered failures at the box office but nothing compared to THE MAN WHO KILLED QUIXOTE, an original idea Gilliam was shooting in 2000 for three days before they had to shut down production. The whole ordeal was documented in LOST IN LA MANCHA (check out that link or watch it for full details) but destruction included a freak rain storm washing away the set and equipment- or as insurance companies call that an act of God (are you beginning to feel that maybe someone upstairs doesn't want him making films?)

The there is IMAGINARIUM, which did get made and is a wonderful film but, as has been well documented, only after the star, Heath Ledger, literally died mid shoot. Coincidence? The day after filming completed, one of the producers died and, oh yeah, Gilliam himself was hit by a bus breaking his back, during editing.

He was quoted as saying, "They got the star, they got the producer, but they didn't get the director!" Nice move Terry,if God is after you, you should totally mock him.Which brings us to his latest film attempt announced the week of Crackpots theory for Judgment Day. I'm sure we will be fine but again, if I am wrong, I think we all know who's ass to kick in the afterlife.

Got to the love Colin Farrell (and Ellen)

WASHINGTON DC: Comedy of errors

There are things that happen in life that make you think, “If my life were a comedy, this would make the blooper reel.” Sometimes it is the things that make you laugh and sometimes it’s the laughs that keeping you from crying. This trip was loaded with both.

1. When visiting the SHAKESPEARE LIBRARY we were surprised to find that there are no actual Shakespearian artifacts, only that of his contemporaries.

2. The way I feel about David Cook is pretty transparent. He is, among other things, my favorite singer and I have, as you know, gone to extraordinary lengths to see him. So explain to me why would I ignore him?

On Race day David was being annoyed by fans. I say annoyed because, as if it shouldn’t be common courtesy, members of David’s team are told that the day is about the Race and in the spirit of keeping everything on time, that he should not be asked for hugs, hugging pictures, or autographs but indeed there were about ten people who didn’t think they should follow the rule. Aside from everything else, I know that it is an emotional day for him so I wouldn’t bother him anyway. I had to pass him and the hounding fans to get my team bracelet and, to my surprise, as I passed he said hello and threw his arm out for a hug. It never occurred to me, until I completely brushed by him, that he was aiming for me. His brother said, “Ooh shut down,” and David laughed, “Yeah, I guess not.” I didn’t want to go back and pity-hug him so I just yelled really loudly, “I needed my bracelet.” I think there was a part of Lauren that wanted to slap me, and probably still does.

3. Saturday Night, after a great soak in the pool and hot tub, it occurred to us that our wet bathing suits would never dry so we decided to throw them in the Guest Landry Dryer. After our showers we went down to do this (in jammies) and realized there wasn’t a change machine so Lauren went to the lobby for quarters, while I was to wait in the glass laundry room that is located inside the gym. The gym had a TV and it was playing the royal wedding so went into the middle of the gym and stood there watching until I realized it would look weird just standing there so I went on a treadmill. In my pajamas- and flip flops- with a towel over my shoulders so my wet hair didn’t wet my shirt; again I did this to NOT look weird. Then Lauren came back and I realized she had her towel around her head in a hair turban and had worn it that way to the check in desk; there is always someone weirder.

4. While waiting for Sunday’s dinner to cook, I ran to the lobby bathroom, outside of which a middle aged Italian man in a suit told me I was beautiful which I am sure had nothing to do with my low cut top and asked why I was in town. I responded the Brain Cancer race and thanked him, saying I was leaving (hint leave me alone.) He told me that I was more beautiful than all the women he knew at home (Italy) and asked for my number. He creeped me out so I said sorry and that I am engaged to the chair of the race, which is why he wasn’t there, but would be meeting me at the airport. He believed me and was very apologetic but if word comes out that David Cook is engaged to a blond, sorry world that was just me.

5. Megabus going down

Going anywhere in NYC during rush hour means traffic so it wasn’t really a problem that our 9:30 am bus didn’t even arrive at our bus stop until 9:45. Whatever, it happens. However many hours later Lauren decided to plug in her iPod charger in the outlets Megabus loves to brag they have and, much like last year, the outlet was dead. Annoyed, she unplugged it and half of her charger remained in the wall.

6. Megabus coming home

Sunday night we ate an early dinner so we prepared to snack on the bus with chips and an obscene amount of bottles of water which we swiped from the race Along with this, we were filled to the brim from a day of staying hydrated but not to worry, Megabuses have bathrooms. Guess what? Right after the bus played it’s welcome video- including how the bus was thoroughly inspected before every journey- passengers were informed there was good news and bad news. Good news: we were not making a stop to pick up or drop off in Baltimore as scheduled. Bad News: the toilet wasn’t working, but we would make a rest stop at some point. An hour (and short nap later) my bladder was exploding and Lauren told me just to go and not flush. I actually responded that I wasn’t sure if I should because, “I didn’t want to get in trouble.” You know because I am a five year old and in kindergarten! I did however risk the “trouble” and went.

We stopped at the rest stop around 10 pm (or as most Americans new it the time Obama was announcing that US troops killed Osama Bin Ladden.) While wandering around deciding if we wanted snacks, I noticed CNN was on the TVs and said, “Hey look CNN, oh whatever, I don’t care, if it’s important I will hear it tomorrow.” When we entered the Lincoln Tunnel not long later, and ever lane was lined with five police cars on either side, my jaded New York self thought nothing of it, and neither of these events clicked into my head as related or anything big until my mother told me what had happened when I called her to tell her that I was taking a cab from Manhattan to the Bronx (spending triple what I would have on the train I was planning on taking home) to save time, so I could go to bed. And of course the driver was Middle Eastern, and no they are not all terrorists but some of them are, so rather than telling Lauren sitting next to me what my mom had said, I texted her, “DON’T REACT AT ALL…WE KILLED BIN LADDEN.”

Just that day, we had been in the NEWSEUM looking at 9-11 remains and trust me when I tell you, it was so hard not to cheer, but while we may be nuts, we aren’t stupid.

WASHINGTON DC: RACE FOR HOPE PHOTOS

Washington DC: Race for Hope 2011

Much like last year, this is proving hard to start. I am still baffled by how to describe the feeling of thousands of people who, for a brief moment in time, are all one. The first rule of Journalism is show, don’t tell but even a thousand words per photo can’t adequately describe something you see with your heart and breathe in with your soul, but I’ll try.

Weather-wise, the day couldn’t be more different than it was a year ago, or for that matter the rest of the weekend. Whereas last year, it seemed to be a hundred degrees by the time the sun rose, this Sunday morning was cool and a bit overcast. It wasn’t at all unpleasant,however, possible even better for running, and the mood was just as chipper as it had been. These people are resilient, if cancer doesn’t stop them, what could a few clouds do?

After meeting up with my fellow DAVID COOK TEAM FOR A CURE members for a brief pep talk by the man himself, I decided to head over to the sidewalk next to the start of the race immediately. I’d done this last year and recommend that anyone who isn’t timed try this because it gives you an amazing view of the survivors marching towards the starting point, with their signature yellow balloons in hand. For me this is probably the best moment of the entire event because in the middle of that sea of yellow are the people who looked at the odds and defied them. It makes my heart smile just thinking about them. I do not know any of those people personally but I feel proud of every single one of them nonetheless.

Cook once again led the survivors out on this walk to the speakers aptly playing his song “HEROES.” As the crowd reached the starting line to thunderous applause, I noticed his black shirt nearing a small group of people who I quickly realized were his parents, step parents, and younger brother. Recalling the balloon the Cook men sent to the sky in tribute to Adam (Cook’s older brother who died from the disease two years ago,) I fixated my eyes on them to see if it happened again. Indeed, the father and two sons again gathered slightly to the side of everyone else holding a yellow balloon, but this time, before releasing it, they motioned over toward the rest of the family and two blond children ran over to stand in between them. The children were Adam’s daughter and son and this time they were handed the balloon, which was then released skyward as all five Cooks watched it fly.*

Seconds later, there was a moment of silence followed by the official “GO.” As if that were its cue, the sun began to shine and it seemed clear to me those who have lost this battle were smiling down we get another year closer to the end of Brain Cancer.

*You can argue that I intruded on a family’s private moment by watching but I don’t believe I did. The family could not see me, and furthermore, I only took a photograph of the balloon after it had soared far above anyone who released it. If you weren’t told, you wouldn’t know what it was; I just wanted something to remember that moment for me.