Consider yourselves warned…

As you could probably have guessed from “I cannot believe it has been three years,” I believed Heath Ledger to be an amazing Actor. When he passed (I will always remember finding out) it was unfathomable to me that he was gone, and truth be told, it still is. His acting was a cut above the rest, and a lot of his movies have great spots in my heart, but once that happened, I sort of unconsciously (maybe) stopped watching them. Actually, that isn’t entirely true. I didn’t avoid them and on occasion did catch bits of them in their television, edited down versions, I just never popped them in the DVD player. It wasn’t that it was too hard to watch him; at least I don’t think it was, it was just that with my extensive collection of DVDs, they were sort of lost in the crowd. I have this habit of loving a movie, watching it over and over and then moving on with time and this is what happened. In fact recently, while trying to organize my collection, I found myself saying “Oh yeah, I own CASANOVA.” As proof that it wasn’t too hard to watch Ledger on film, I immediately went out to see his turn as the Joker in DARK KNIGHT when it was released in theaters and, following this pattern, I considered it amazing and then never bothered to watch it again. I will admit that when it came time to see IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS, Ledger’s second “last film” I was a bit scared that I would be hit with a wave of sadness but instead found my new favorite movie, one that contains the sentence “Remember nothing is permanent not even death.”

The thing about it is, a 28 year old in his prime, on the cusp of winning an Oscar, doing interviews where he looks happy, just dying one day is so surreal that it doesn’t register in my mind as something that actually happened and the guy I see in Chelsea from time to time who could be his twin isn’t helping NO ONE SAW THE BODY, I’M JUST SAYING. It seems more probable that he is inside Dr. Parnassus’ mystical mirror, and so I feel no ache or pain, or feeling of loss anymore than you would if you watched your favorite actor in the movie he made before he retired for a quieter life. The point I’m getting to is recently I’ve been getting back into his older work. A few weeks before Thanksgiving (for reason’s still unknown to me) I woke up one morning with one thought in mind- WHY DO I NOT OWN TEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU? By lunch my quest to rectify it was complete, thanks to my mother. Then for Christmas I wanted a BLU-RAY player (for internet access) and as my first BLU-RAY disk, my mother bought me DARK KNIGHT. Because of these, and other movie additions, I had to perform the aforementioned DVD organization, created a Ledger section and thought to myself “I should watch these at some point.”

That point has now come because of a few things.

1- I have had an upper repertory/ cold/sinus thing for two weeks and counting (for those keeping track, the entire Disney Vacation) which leads me to act more homebody-ish than usual.

2- It is cold and snowy! The world does not end because of bad weather but it does make you ask yourself “Do I want to make an effort to go out to Rockwood Music Hall in this weather” especially with a cold. Sorry Dallin, the answer was no.

3- In the Hollywood Studios backlot tour, there was a gondola from CASANOVA, which made me remember that I thought I liked that movie but couldn’t remember any of it.

4- Awards Season- this time of year will always make me think of Heath (as well as Jake Gyllenhall) because my entire winter a few years ago centered around being home to see what awards BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN won and subsequently losing my mind and running around like someone just made me watch them kill my puppy every time Phillip Seymour Hoffman beat out Ledger If you remember I have a weird and unique take on that story and the film was acted so brilliantly by both men as well as Anne Hathaway and it pains me to say nice things about her but credit where it is due, super-slut Michelle Williams.

So now the warning, I am watching a lot of Ledger’s pre-“retirement” movies which means I am probably going to write about them so be ready.